It Doesn't Get Easier!

1:02 PM

First let me start by saying that I have been soooo sick the last few days. I get these pain episodes that start in my back and go to my chest and I have no idea what they are. Sometimes they last only a short time and other times they last all night long. After my all night pain fest I was treated to a bout of the stomach bug so it was all I could do to get the boys to the first day of school yesterday. I say all that to explain why I only have one little sad camera phone photo of the first day of school LOL.

I literally dragged myself out of bed after only two hours of sleep Sunday evening and somehow got the boys ready for their first day, but I forgot the camera so all I have is a lonely photo to remember their first day of school this year.

It never gets easier for me to send them off at the beginning of each school year. It isn't necessarily the fact that they will be gone during the day, since I have been praying for silence and order all summer. No, it is like saying goodbye to another year of their childhood and I just can't stand it. I blink and they are older and bigger and in less need of me. Each year they become more independent and get one step closer to leaving me. I thought I would get over it once they got to be a certain age, but alas I have not.

You will notice from the picture though, that Jase is missing. I decided to hold on to him for a few more weeks, months, who knows how long LOL. I want to send him to preschool for the experience, but I also selfishly want to hold on to my last little boy and not take the leap of sending him somewhere where I will no longer be the center of his life and day. I hope to get him enrolled by Christmas, but I am having a hard time letting go.

Anyone else have any thoughts? Has it become easier for you to let go each year or are you dreading the thought of your little one trotting off to school as well?

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  1. It's always hard for me to see them go out the door...except this year Nails is a Sr in high school and i was so ready to get him out the door...he was too!
    No to be 'Jonny Raincloud', but, I had similar pains and it turned out to be gall stones, you might want to get that checked...

  2. I have one left at home, 1 in high school, 2 in middle and 2 in elementary. After the summer I had, I was ready (and so were they) next year will be different though, my baby will go to kindy. I'll cry.
    I was going to mention the same about the pain...gallstones here too.

  3. They are so cute! I can only imagine that it wont be easy for me either. I am having a hard time with the reality that my three year old will start preschool next year and that is still a ways away! I hope you feel better soon!

  4. Precious. I am doing the same with my youngest. I dont know when I want his to go but it is no today... :)

  5. Hope you are feeling well soon. Motherhood is hard enough without doing it while you're sick!

  6. The pain thing back to chest, all night long,
    well that's how the pain felt when my achalasia started. Your cardiac sphincter muscle (don't worry in this case cardiac doesn't mean heart), which is a little muscle between the bottom of the esophagus (food pipe) and the stomach goes into spasm.
    Though I also knew an RN who was having pains like these, and she wasn't old, and it was her heart.
    Either way, since it goes into your chest, it's probably best to get it checked out.
    Could it be a pinched nerve, maybe, but the going into the chest thing and lasting all night long probably isn't typical of a pinched nerve.
    It my be GERD, gastroesophageal reflux disease,
    but left untreated that can cause a lot of problems and pain too.
    I advice, even if not really wanted is see a Doctor and if it happens again to go to the ER.

  7. Did I mention that I love all of you? LOL Thank-you for the well wishes. I am good as new today and hopefully will have a bit of a break before the next episode comes along. I have decided that if I have another one within the next two weeks I will have it checked out even without the insurance. I used to get it once every few months, but now it is happening more often.

    I am so glad to hear that I am not alone in my feelings about the kids going off to school either! Thank-you all again for the well wishes and advice!



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