Sometimes It Feels Like I am Still in High School

10:51 AM


I love blogging, I really do. However, sometimes I get the feeling that I got in high school. If you were a geek and unpopular like me, you know the one. The one where you literally feel like you just walked in the door naked and everyone is laughing at you. Or, that no matter how hard you try, you will never be recognizable or "fit in". Sometimes blogging can make you me feel that way. While it can make me feel that way, it is also one of the most enjoyable things I have ever done and gives me a voice that I never had, even if I may only be talking to myself.


The Elite Nature of Blogging

You can try to deny it, but there is an elite nature to blogging. The blogging heirarchy is and always will be there. Rightfully so in most cases. The majority of women at the top of the blogging tower have clawed their way there with years and years of hard work. Others, it seems have had an excellerated path to the top for reasons beyond my understanding. I would not begrudge anyone their position in the blogging world though, it just makes it feel like high school is all. Some people are naturally likable and people are drawn to them. I am struggling and will continue to struggle with the fact that I am not one of these types of people. I am soft spoken and I think that comes across in the wrong way sometimes.

Social Network Alienation

Ever look at your stream on Facebook and see tons of your blogging companions getting comments on every single thing they post? Literally, they could post a photo of an eye booger they just picked and get 40 comments. Now, have you ever posted updates only to receive crickets and then delete those same updates before anyone sees that you are a loser talking to yourself? Again, just like high school. Some people naturally have those that communicate with them and others, not so much.

I don't regret what I do, I don't dislike those who are better than me. I wrote this post for one simple reason. To reach out to those who may be feeling the same and to tell them that it is okay. We aren't in high school anymore. In fact, most of us have been out for longer than we care to admit to. It all boils down to trying to be comfortable with who you are and what you're doing. I am working on it still myself, it is not a skill that comes easy to those who have had low self esteem their entire lives due to bullying and abusive relationships, but I am confident it is one that can be learned. So stand tall, be proud of who you are and embrace the fact that high school is long gone!

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30 comments

  1. Hi Kathleen. Thanks for making this post but the only thing that does not affiliate with me is that I am 15 so I am still in high school(tee hee). Other than that I agree with you on everything..... even the feeling of being naked and walking into a room but my friends and I use that feeling to be known as the odd and random group which makes me very happy. Also our school is so big that we only know a small amount of our peers. Hey, someone commented so you don't have to delete this post. Bye for now.

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  2. OMG, Lol. I had to laugh about the FB photo share. I'm lucky if I get 3 likes on a post. It is hard when you work so hard on your blog and you just feel like it's not growing like it should.

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  3. Thanks for stopping by Hannah and Kelly. Hannah, I am so glad that you and your friends have embraced your roles in high school. Unfortunately, I went to a very tiny school, so everyone knew everything about everyone else. I am happy with where my blog is, didn't mean for it to come across otherwise, it is just easy to get discouraged online sometimes I think.

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  4. I definitely relate to this post. I was just telling my husband that I'm not sure I'm cut out for the amount of rejection that comes along with blogging...from other bloggers, from PR, for opps, etc. It can be really disheartening!

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  5. I'm happy with my blogging and always trying to move forward to achieve my goals, however I do feel that the blogging world can often be like a big high school. I've tried reaching out to many, but haven't gotten far.

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  6. {Hugs}

    I feel like this sometimes as well! I just try to remember that I am what I am and I can't be anything different.

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  7. Kathleen - I just celebrated the second anniversary of my blog and feel the same way. I have to admit I kind of enjoy being a bit of a loner, yet still having a piece of the blogging pie. Let's start our own clique.

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  8. I feel you on this Kathleen. I just SMH because it's not even high school, it's just pure elementary in most cases. But I digress because just like the Mean Girls, someone has sent a note around telling them it's cute to be cliqued up. LOL! Keep doing you...

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  9. Sigh it is a little like HS, but honestly I more so do my blog for myself. It's my outlet and my own little journal. If no one reads in the end I'm happy cause I still have my moments to look back on :)

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  10. blogging CAN be a little like blogging but honestly, I have found to just ignore things. It's the best way to be professional and not get into the drama

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  11. Agree with Jennifer above - I just ignore it when I see it. And about the whole FB thing...I think that what you put into Facebook makes a difference. When I don't actively socialize, I get no comment love either.

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  12. Thanks ladies. Nice to know I am not alone in my feelings. I definitely avoid drama at all costs Jennifer, never been my thing.

    Courtney, who could pass up your adorable baby belly LOL.

    Jenn I definitely try to interact everyday on Facebook, but it doesn't seem to make much of a difference, especially with the new dumb way Facebook works the feeds.

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  13. I appreciate your writing this. I think all of us who blog have some sort of struggle. Mine isn't exactly the same. I started my blog to write, to express ideas and feelings, then it evolved into something altogether different, only I didn't purchase a domain, etc. and do 'the right bloggy things'. If I started now, it would be completely different. Try not to let anyone get you down though, you're awesome!

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  14. ((hugs)) You are awesome. I feel exactly the same way though.

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  15. I think you have hit the nail on the head, Kathleen. Sometimes I wonder why I am doing this. It takes so long to get people to begin reading your blog, but I do enjoy blogging so I persist. I enjoy reading your posts. You have an informative and fun blog, so keep up the good work.

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  16. I'll admit that I'm pretty much an outcast in the blogging world, but I pretty love what I do and ignore the rest. This probably helps me avoid a lot of the drama that goes on, too. :-)

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  17. At times I wish I was bigger and more visable, but overall I'm pretty happy with where I am. But there are definitely people that post one thing and the FB blows up. I get a little here and there. I honestly wish I could spend more time on my blog I feel that I could make it bigger, better, and have more time to interact with others. I'm just not ready to risk my full time steady job for that of blogging.

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  18. I was that person in HS too and still am!! Totally relate!

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  19. Hehe, I totally understand what you're talking about. I respect most of the bloggers who have blazed the trail before me, but sometimes I run into those that are just so snobby about the success they've found! Luckily 99% of the blogging community I've had the pleasure of knowing have been amazing and so helpful...but yes, there are those..."fun" people. Lol!

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  20. I hear what you mean, but I have definitely made some amazing friends too!

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  21. I am truly a loner and have days where I reach out and am all yadda yadda all over the place but that is why I moved out to our farm, not a person in sight, no neighbors, just my hubby and I every night, solitude and so happy to be alone with my cool old self :-)

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  22. I'm right there with you. Especially the photo comment thing! lol One blogger posts a picture of their coffee cup and everyone goes nuts. Another blogger posts a photo of something monumental and you can hear crickets chirping. But ya know...it's not just bloggers. Everyone online feels it. I think THE INTERNET is like HS all over again lol

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  23. I know what you mean, especially with BlogHer approaching ... it might be nice to be "famous" but I think as long as you are posting quality content, then you will be fine. :)

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  24. I hear you on that FB interaction. I swear sometimes it's crickets - and then every once in a while someone is listening... drives me batty too!

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  25. I so can relate. I actually had to join comment groups just to not feel bad about my posts being lonely. I love all your guys that stop by and I thank you. Thanks for sharing your thoughts HUGS

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  26. I'm there with you. We just have to keep at it.

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  27. I know where you're coming from. I have the same issues/feelings. Sometimes you want to say "Hey, I'm here, talking... am I invisible, or something". It does help knowing I'm not the only one that feels this way, though. Thanks for sharing!

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  28. I have always struggled with this ...and,yes, I was socially awkward in high school too. I would love to be more respected and known. Sometimes it doesn't make sense who "makes" it and who doesn't.

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  29. "It all boils down to trying to be comfortable with who you are and what you're doing." -- This totally speaks to me. I know exactly how feel. In the blogging world, I really do feel out of place and lonely sometimes. But it's something I'm working on, especially with letting more of ME shine through online.

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