How Do You Stop the Infamous Pre-Teen Mouth?

12:38 PM

As parents, we have all experienced the infamous tween attitude that our children develop the moment they realize that they now know everything there is to know in the world. My oldest has been developing his "mouth" for the last year or so, but it has finally fully matured as of his 10th birthday a week or so ago. Now, he says seemingly innocent statements with the venom of the most poisonous snake and when I confront him, he acts surprised and mentions that he didn't say anything bad. Then I have to have an argument about how it wasn't what he said but how he said it, which always results in my words floating over his head.

So, the other day, I finally discovered a way to deal with the infamous "mouth"of my tween. After screaming at me that I was "torturing him" for correcting something he did and that he "hates this day," I quietly escorted him to his room without a word, told him to get in bed calmly and informed him that when dinner was ready I would give it to him in his bed.

When it was time for dinner, I placed the plate on his bed without a word and walked out. Right before sending the others to bed, I went in and said only "goodnight." As I was leaving the room, he called out an apology for his actions and asked for a kiss (highly uncommon for a knowitall tween.)

The next day he was extra well behaved and we haven't heard from the "mouth" lately. So, how do you deal with the infamous mouth of a pre-teen. In my house, we deal with it with calm quiet and it seems to work just fine. How do you deal with mouthiness from your pre-teen or teenager?

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    12 comments

    1. this is what i fear. my boys are 4 and 2 right now. the 4 YO has a mouth on him already. right now i can tell him, "no fruit snacks" and that is a great bargaining chip. your problems are way out of my league :)

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    2. Hopefully I'll be as calm as you one day. I'm not looking forward to pre-teen mouth!!

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    3. That is a great way of dealing with it!!

      I love it.

      I used something a little different with my preteen (she is now 18). I gave her a cap ful of vinegar. It won't hurt her, but it sure does cute down on the amount of lip I was getting. She is now well adjusted and headed off to college in a month!

      Good luck!!! It does get better.. when they are 18... it's a treat!

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    4. Great input ladies. Karla, as long as you show them you mean business at a young age and they know they won't get away with anything, it will be easier to deal with when they are older.

      I love the vinegar idea, but not sure if I could follow through with it. I bet it sure does hush the mouth though. :)

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    5. I don't have a tween yet but that is a great way to deal with the "mouth". I think that would have totally worked for me LOL. BTW I awarded you on my blog so check it out when you can!

      "You don't know ho much you don't know until your children grow up and tell you how much you don't know."
      S.J. Perelman

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    6. I love this post! I call it "shunning" and it works well for three of my boys (one's a loner-he'd love to be sent to his room to eat). Vinegar - they defy me! They see it as a dare, "mmmm, tastes like pickles - no, wait....Easter Eggs..."

      So sweet that he asked for a kiss goodnight!

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    7. I think the sitting in the room with the calm silence is a great idea. Right now, their comments are mild at their young age and if they get a little sassy I remind them that their mouths were made to do good things, not for negative/ugly things. However, I know that is not going to last too much longer!

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    8. I love that quote Hannah!

      Leah - That is so funny that they would say that about the vinegar. Mine said the same thing about hot sauce, that is when I stopped using things like that lol.

      It is by far easier when they are little and can be made to see that their words are wrong. When they are older though, they use appropriate words in a nasty tone and see absolutely nothing wrong with it.

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    9. We cured this with soap - yep we washed her mouth out with soap - that was a lesson learned, and nary a foul or saucy tone comes out of her mouth any more.

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    10. I plan on using Duct tape.... lol is that legal?

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    11. I can totally relate. I have an almost 11 year old son and a 13 year old daughter. I don't know which one is worst. They both drive me batty. LOL!

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    12. LOL Eve, I think the use of duct tape with children is generally frowned upon.

      Kimberly, I can certainly understand the feeling, at least I don't have to deal with a girl.

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